I never intended to be a writer, I honestly never really had any idea what I would do when I became an adult. The truth is I didn't think I'd make it to be one, some days I even hoped I wouldn't. But, I did become an adult and most days still didn't know what I wanted to do with my life.
Then a little of three years ago I started having this dream, this teen aged boy kept asking me why his mother hated him. In my dream he was in a rundown disgusting apartment working his butt off while his mother entertained men, drank and did drugs. I started writing out his story just so he'd shut up. My twin found it and that's when it'll begin. Safe Haven was born. She'd sit behind me and demand a certain amount of words before I'd be allowed to go to the bathroom or get up from my desk. (If you can't tell I have a bit of a submissive side.) It took six months but the story was done. Soon after book two was completed and then book three. It's now been over a year and many of you are wondering where book four is.
The thing is I've been in such a dark place for so long that I wasn't able to write. My demons had been whispering in my ears for a few years, but the voices of my characters had been louder. But over the last two years, the demons began to win the battle. The voices slowly disappeared behind the cacophony of torments my demons were shouting at me.
I've battled depression, anxiety and a multitude of other initials within the mental health arena since I hit double digits. I've been on and off meds for most of my life. But this time I'd gone the longest ever, almost five years. That was a major mistake! I went to the doctor and got back on meds a couple of weeks ago. My demons have been tempered, but I fear what affects the meds will have on the voices. I guess only time will tell.
I'm not writing this for sympathy or attention. I only write this so you my fans can see why when I beg your forgiveness for the delays in book four, it wasn't for a frivolous reason. I was battling for my sanity on a daily basis. For those who saw me and question how I seemed so okay..... it's called a mask. One of dozens I don as needed to get through whatever situation is at hand.
-The war isn't over, but this battle I've turned the times in our favor. Safe Haven: Asylum will be out sometime in April. I'll be putting it up for pre-order, just to prove I mean what I say and to give myself a hard deadline to finish the story.
And to all who read this, who battle their demons I hope you have the strength to keep fighting and know you're not alone. I'm always here if you need some that understands.